Memories of Spokane-Serious Story # 3

I hesitate telling this story because it is so close to my heart- its like a little secret I have- or rather a memory I hold that I can see so perfectly- as if it was still happening- that I wanted to nurture it and keep it safe- so no one could take my memory, read it and distort it to something in their own mind other than what it really was. I can't capture it in words because it was such a beautiful time- something I don't think I'll ever have again. People who weren't there just don't know. Some people who were there don't want to remember it because it just was that pure that it's so hard to concentrate on life if you remember it. Others who were there will remember it and get lost in the retelling, knowing again, words just don't do it justice and no amount of any planning could recapture and show again what happened there in that alley. I'm am eternally connected to the people who are a part of the memory- no matter how far away they get or what argument may arise- these people were part of what I can only call "true community."

When the six of us sat down on the cold concrete our behinds were chilled. We all pulled out coats down a little so we were sitting on some padding and to help make the concrete not so cold. I think we all knew something was happening to us that would make us forever changed and this might take a while, as most changes do.

To set more of a tone, here is a song by Caedmon's Call that touches on a little of what we all knew and felt:
"A New Day"
I can feel it in the darkness of the night
I can feel it in the breaking of the dawn
I can see it in the setting of the sun
A New Day is coming
I can almost hear the angel's choir
As the coldest hearts are being set on fire
What has been destroyed will be rising even higher
A New Day is coming

At the end of the darkness
We'll burn these chains
And we will never be the same
We will be free
We will be free
All our tears will be swept into the sea
And we will be free

Free to find Your glory in our dreams
To love and serve our God & family
The full being of who we were meant to be
A New Day is coming

A Day when the sun shines on the truth
And the Old man is changed into the new
Yes the old is changed into the new
A New Day is coming!

At the end of the darkness
We'll burn these chains
And we will never be the same

We will be free
We will be free
All our fears will be swept into the sea
And we will be free

We will follow
we will follow-
Wherever you lead

We will be free.....

Right before we found our way to an alley, we had started walking places we had been before with a couple guitars. Summer was ending so we were accustomed to singing outside in the park or in the school parking lot or on Derek & Marty's porch. Even though it was cold we decided to head out again hoping to find somewhere to sing again. We were in denial that the warm summer nights were gone.

As we exited the guy's place we were silent. That verse about the spirit resonating with in us was true for us in a way more real than any other night we had gone out to do the same. The closest place we saw was this small ( by small I mean about an arms width wide and 10 feet long). So we walked into that alley and sat down. Derek and Marty broke out their guitars and started to play. We were still quiet. The light from the moon was shining right down into that little crevice so we could see each others faces. We began to praise God through song. Kenny took Derek's guitar and taught us a new song that he often called his life's theme song. Then as Marty and Kenny played, the music got quiet and Marty just started praying. He asked for forgiveness for specific sins in front of all of us as he prayed. Tears came to him. Kenny and then Derek prayed for forgiveness for their specific sins and praised the God who forgives. Chrissy and Sarah and I all followed suit. As we prayed, we prayed to God as if no one else was listening but God- there was trust among us and the spirit within us.

In between each person praying we would sing a song and praise God for his grace. I had never ever been apart of people that vulnerable before. We shared stories on how God was specifically working that year in us. I didn't have to hide my sin, or even hide in my sin because others were so willing to let the light of grace shine in our dark hearts. We sang more after our time on prayer and confession.

Someone prayed one last time and we knew that it was time to head home. Four hours had passed and it only seemed like 15 minutes.

I think I realized that even though I wanted to recreate that night it was something that I never created to begin with. The spirit moved in the six of us to draw us to the cross, purge us of sin, renew our relationship to Christ and bring us closer to the people we shared that night with.

I know this may sound crazy, but I think that night was a glimpse into the purity and community in heaven.